Communicating Non-Verbally - Are You Paying Attention?
There are some professions in which paying attention to non-verbal communication is essential. If you’re a police officer interviewing suspected criminals, you need to observe clues that could take you beyond what the suspect is actually saying; business coaches are skilled at helping their clients access subconscious resources by picking up on non-verbal clues; poker masters study ‘tells’ to help them determine when opponents might be bluffing. For many folk in business however, it’s possible that we pay scant attention to the verbal and non-verbal mix of our day-to-day communication.
Albert Mehrabian PhD, was a psychology professor at UCLA.
He is much quoted for his pioneering work on non-verbal communication. Importantly, he postulated that there are three key elements making up face-to-face communication:
- Words
- Voice tone
- Body language (including facial expressions).
Mehrabian also attributed percentages to these elements based on studies he conducted. These findings are often (incorrectly) generalised out to mean that in all communications:
- 7% happens in spoken words
- 38% happens through tone of voice
- 55% happens via body language.
This is clearly not true in all scenarios - as a non-German speaker, I have challenged myself to try and understand 93% of the words a German speaker says to me, and it doesn’t work! However, there are some interesting considerations prompted by Mehrabian’s work which have a direct impact on our ability to influence.
For example, there is no doubt that our voice tone (along with pace, timbre, volume) and our physiology (gestures, posture, facial expressions) contribute to the overall messages we convey when we communicate face-to-face. A key impact of this is those times when we don’t have conviction in the words we are saying. Invariably when this is the case, our physiology and voice tone cease to be congruent with the words we are using, and the listener may start to draw conclusions about what we are ‘saying’ which belie our words. Conversely, if we are passionate and convinced that what we are saying holds true for us, our body language and voice quality will mirror and support this.
Try this out for yourself today.
When was the last time you said something to someone else that you didn’t wholeheartedly believe in? What effect did this have on your physiology and voice tone? A frozen smile perhaps? Voice trailing off at the end of the sentence …?
And conversely, what physiology and tone of voice do you have when you have ultimate conviction in your words? It’s my guess that these are the times when you are at your most gloriously influential!
Helen Krag, Agile
Influence for Positive Change